[Splinter]( October 1, 2019
[Trumpâs Spent Years Being a Total Dick to Rudy](
[Former New York City Mayor and frothy-mouthed cable news fuck-up Rudy Giuliani is arguably President Donald Trumpâs most vigorous public defender, spending what seems like his every waking moment spewing unhinged conspiracy theories about the deep state and George Soros and defending the president from the threat of impeachment.](
[[2020](](@feature1LinkUrl)
[Mayor Pete's Favorite TV Shows Are Pretty Damning Stuff](
[Still unsure where you fall on Mayor Pete for president? Perhaps knowing heâs a Rick and Morty stan will change your mind!](
[[White House](](@feature2LinkUrl)
[Mouse in the (White) House](
[THEY FOUND THE RATâor mouse, at least. (No, not that one.)](
[[White House](](@feature3LinkUrl)
[Democrats Suggest Trump May Have Lied Under Oath to Mueller](
[It seems like a lifetime ago that Robert Mueller filed his report on Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election. Since then, Democrats have largely shifted their attention to Ukraine, and President Donald Trumpâs efforts to persuade President Volodymyr Zelensky to interfere in the next presidential election. But because what...](
[[White House](](@feature4LinkUrl)
[Trump Spews Absolute Nonsense Before Walking Out on Reporters](
[Here is an interaction with the president of the United States that I cannot hope to fully understand. Following an Oval Office event this afternoon to swear in Gene Scalia, the new secretary of Labor, Donald Trump briefly took questions from the press.](
[[Cable News](](@feature5LinkUrl)
[Leave It to Fox & Friends to Make the Ukraine Scandal Seem Like Rocket Science](
[Leave it to Fox News to tell their viewers that thereâs no use in trying to understand all this impeachment stuffâitâs just so darn confusing!](
[[2020](](@feature6LinkUrl)
[Mark Zuckerberg Says a Warren Presidency Would Totally 'Suck' for Facebook Which, Good](
[Speaking with employees in a staff meeting in July, Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg held forth on a number of issues facing him and the social media giant heâs steered to global dominance over the past decade and a half. Among those issues, according to audio of the meetings...](
[[The Discourse](](@feature7LinkUrl)
[We Love That Classic October Heatwave, Don't We Folks?](
[Today is October 1. Itâs still hot as fuck outside. On Thursday, October 3, the Apple weather app tells me, the high is going to be 98. You gotta be freakinâ kiddinâ me!!!](
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[Weather Whiplash Is About to Hit the U.S.](
[Impeachment is hardly the only thing dividing America. The weather is doing the same, cleaving the country into two distinct seasons this week.](
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[The Ukrainian Orphan Who Is Actually Maybe an Adult Has Been Found in Indiana](
[The story of the 6-year-old Ukrainian orphan who may or may not have actually been a murderous adult has raised many, many questions among those fascinated by her case, but the most pressing one is definitely, âWhere is she now?â Well, good news for us! Natalia has been found, and...](
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[The Internet Ruined âDudeâ](
[Today, weâre talking about un-Googleable band names, your groin, mustard-drenched testicles, and more.](
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[Ravens Try To Clear Marlon Humphrey By Releasing Video Of Him Pushing Fist Into Odell Beckham Jr.'s Neck](
[Ravens cornerback Marlon Humphrey and Browns receiver Odell Beckham Jr. were getting chippy all game Sunday during Clevelandâs 40-25 victory. There were no ejections, only offsetting penalties, when the two locked up, Beckham took a swing, then Humphrey threw him to the ground. Browns head coach Freddie Kitchens wanted Humphrey...](
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[A Story About Two Tiny, Fuzzy Photos of a 'PlayStation 5 Prototype'](
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