We Blew It

[The beef 675] [I'm an image] “Hey, at least gas prices might be a little lower?” - Jason Hey there carnivores, Markets got crushed on Monday. Today we’re talking about what exactly happened on Wall Street. Keep raging, Jeff & Jason [Image] [I'm an image] A blown fuse “Do not pass GO. Do not divest $200.” - the S&P 500 plunge protection team, probably. Markets opened lower yesterday, as oil drama and COVID-19 fears continued to grip markets. And that was the high point of the day ... Stocks [got dunked on]( Monday. In fact, not too long after the open, trading was halted as the S&P 500 fell 7% past its previous open. The dramatic drop triggered the circuit breakers, which halted trading for fifteen minutes, presumably so investors could pour one out for their wallets. Circuit breakers? Yep, you read right. Former US Treasury Secretary Nicholas Brady [brought circuit breakers]( to the US trading floor after the flash crash of 1987 (bad year). Originally implemented for the Dow, the S&P inherited the fail-safe, with a goal of giving hedge funds, institutional investors, and regular traders like you and me a breather before potentially selling off any more stock. The circuit breakers were last #triggered in 1997, when they were activated twice on the same day to stop the, well, bleeding, on Bloody Monday. But, does it work? It did yesterday. The lows held for the AM, before the S&P eventually closed down 7.6% on the day. The Nasdaq also fell 7.29%, and the Dow… don’t get me started. Less than two weeks after having its first same-day loss of over 1k points, it beat its own record by closing down over 2k points. Really puts the DOW in down, doesn’t it? The energy and financial sectors dragged down the index, which had its worst day since 2008 (also a bad year), and fell within 65 points of reaching a bear market. [You hear that, Ed? Bears.]( Not to be outdone Oil benchmarks [had their worst trading day]( since 1991 when Iraq invaded Kuwait, with WTI and Brent crude both falling over 24% over concerns of the tensions between Saudi Arabia and Russia. Investors fear an oversupply, but I’m sure you[already knew that.]( The bottom line... If this clusterf*ck doesn’t spell the end of the human race, this could be a great opportunity to buy the f*cking dip. That is, of course, if you aren’t using Robinhood as your brokerage ... Robinhood had performance issues again (“I swear this never happens!”), with trading [partially restored]( at 10:30 AM for some users, although many faced issues throughout the day. If Robinhood and the markets past 24-hours is any indication we’re in for another rough week balls deep in correction territory as we flirt with a bear market. That is, of course, unless Uncle Sam has a trick or two up his sleeve as POTUS hinted at last night. We [can expect to hear]( more this afternoon about potential payroll tax relief, assistance for hourly wage earners who can’t afford to stay home if they are sick and industries disrupted by the outbreak. [Image] Limited Release: Only available for a limited time. Brace Yourself For The Next Wave Of Volatility [I'm an image]( Position Yourself To Profit Before These Shocking Events Start To Unfold Kyle Dennis Exposes The Truth In His Brand New Report [Download Free NOW!]( [I'm an image] ☑️ The fix is in. Stitch Fix had Monday that went a lot like the rest of the market... but it only has itself to blame after a weak second quarter. Shares of the personal styling service [fell 6%]( during trading hours on Monday, before promptly falling 35% after-hours. The San Fran based stylists reported earnings per share of 11 cents, compared to the analyst expected 6 cents, while bringing in $451.8M in revenue against an expected $452.5. Stitch Fix also let investors know it only expects net revenue of between $1.81B and $1.84B, which falls short of analysts’ $1.92B expectations. According to the company, a “promotional environment” in the US calls for a focus on growing its offering of “lower-priced items,” and therefore led to a weak outlook. If this market keeps up, we’ll all need to focus on lower priced items. ☑️ Hanging by a thread. @Jack isn’t going anywhere… for the time being. Twitter and Elliott Management [have agreed]( to a deal to rearrange the social media platform’s board, while leaving CEO Jack Dorsey right where he is. Which is probably in a corner office microdosing mushrooms or something. The deal requires Twitter to appoint two new board members, and a third, independent director. Twitter also signed itself up for $2B in share repurchases, funded partly through a $1B investment from Silver Lake. Oh, and Twitter also has to deliver growth, whatever that means. Words straight out of a corporate jargon erotic novel. ☑️ When the going gets tough, resign. Elizabeth Duke [is out]( as chairman of Wells Fargo’s board of directors, just days before she was to face a congressional hearing where she’d likely be pressured to step down. Replacing Duke will be Charles Noski, a board member since 2019 and a key player in hiring the firm’s current CEO. Joining Duke on the unemployment line is James Quigley, another WF board member. Quigley was also expected to be pressed to step down during Wednesday’s congressional hearing. Both Duke and Quigley were under fire for not showing regulators the respect they felt they deserved. The regulators’ examples of negligence included Duke asking why regulatory requests had been sent to her and not a regional manager, and Quigley postponing meetings because he was in the Galapagos. I mean, can’t a guy take a few days OOO without federal regulators breathing down his neck? 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