Your NewsThump Daily Briefing for Mon, 07 Oct

This is your daily summary of the topical jokes and stories on NewsThump.com [View this email in your browser]( [NewsThump Daily Briefing Header]( Hello from NewsThump! Thank you for signing up to the NewsThump Daily Briefing! Below you will find the top stories on our site for today Mon, 07 Oct. We hope you enjoy them! [T-shirt of the week!]( [“One down, only a hundred and fifteen to go” insist jubilant Man City fans]( [Manchester City fans] Man City have been cleared of one accusation of financial irregularity by an arbitration panel, leaving jubilant supporters with just 115 further charges to worry about. [Read the rest of this story »]( [Woman saves money on dog chew toy by buying a new pair of shoes]( [Dog chewing shoes] Frugal local woman Simone Williams has saved herself the cost of buying her dog a chew toy by purchasing a new pair of shoes instead, she has revealed. [Read the rest of this story »]( [‘Maybe, I DO really want to know how your garden grows,’ says hypocrite horticulturalist Noel Gallagher]( [Noel Gallagher tour for As You Were.] Noel Gallagher has shocked fans by confessing that he actually DOES really want to know how your garden grows despite nearly thirty years of claiming the opposite. [Read the rest of this story »]( [‘It’s wokeness gone mad!’ – parents left furious after religious ceremony sees son wear dress while being lectured to by a man in dress]( [Unhappy family] A Christian couple who are suing a local religious organisation after they let an 8-year-old boy attend a religious ceremony in a dress, where everyone was encouraged to listen to another man also in a dress. [Read the rest of this story »]( [Santa to leave naughty children a copy of Boris Johnson’s memoir in move away from fossil fuel]( [Santa reading Boris Johnson's book] Instead of coal this Christmas, Santa Claus has found something else to give to badly behaved kids to ensure they know they’re not well thought of. This Christmas morning, disobedient and mischievous children will open their stockings to face the ultimate horror – a copy of Unleashed by Boris Johnson. Father Christmas explained, “For hundreds [Read the rest of this story »]( Don't forget, you can read everything we do completely free from ads, get exclusive access to subscriber-only pieces, AND support NewsThump, all for the price of a single coffee a month. Click below to learn more! [SUPPORT NEWSTHUMP AND GET EVERYTHING AD-FREE!]( Copyright © 2024 Thump Publishing Limited, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because you asked us to send you a daily summary of NewsThump's headlines. A wise choice, may we add. Our mailing address is: Thump Publishing Limited 40 Caversham RoadReading, Berkshire RG1 7BT United Kingdom [Add us to your address book]( Want to change how you receive these emails? You can [update your preferences]( or [unsubscribe from this list](. [Mailchimp Email Marketing](