Newsletter Monday, March 28, 2016

[LaineyGossip.com - Calling all smuthounds!] Monday, March 28, 2016 [Intro for March 28, 2016] [Ben Affleck kisses Jennifer Lopez at the 75th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on March 23, 2003 in Hollywood, California] Dear Gossips, While Batfleck dominated the box office this weekend (more on that later), Jennifer Lopez is making headlines for talking about their relationship. In an interview with Jess Cagle, editorial director for both PEOPLE and Entertainment Weekly, she confirms that there was “genuine love” between them. And yet… “I really felt like when I met Ben I was like, ‘OK this is it’. Sometimes I feel like what you think people are and how you see them when you love them is different than when they reveal, later. And I think we had a lot of, we didn’t try to have a public relationship. We just happened to be together at the birth of the tabloids.” First of all, it wasn’t the birth of the tabloids. The tabloids were around long before Bennifer. But it was the birth of the gossip blog. And Bennifer certainly contributed to our rise. Second…what she’s saying, or not saying here, about what you learn about someone after you start loving them, it’s another way of describing the two Ben Afflecks, non? Jennifer Garner described the way it feels when he’s paying attention to you – and when he’s not (warm in the sun, cold in the shadow) and Jennifer Lopez can also very much relate to the experience of being with a man who’s still trying to figure out how to be with himself. You can smell that on Ben Affleck. And, yet, for some reason, we are told that this is attractive. I promise you there are so many women who are drawn to it. We’ve seen so many women who’ve been drawn to it. He’s disappointed every single one. Yours in gossip, Lainey [To view the videos associated with this article click here.] [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 12:36 PM [Beckham split: money first, then marriage?] [David and Victoria Beckham] [Radar posted] a sensational headline today: Beckham Split! When you read the story though, it’s about business assets. Newly released Victoria Beckham, Ltd., filings obtained by Radar reveal that after six years at the helm of VBL with Victoria and CEO Robert Dodds, David secretly resigned as a director of the company on December 10, 2014. On that date, the company’s “entire issued share capital was transferred to” VBL parent company Beckham Brand Holdings, Ltd., and reissued with 1/3 going to Victoria, 1/3 to David, and 1/3 to Dodds. Documents filed in the UK also note that on that date, all “contracts held by the company related to the David Beckham brand were transferred during the year to DB Ventures Limited, a sister company” that is specifically “focused on exploiting the David Beckham brand,” without Victoria, 41. Radar seems to be suggesting that the division of assets is a prelude to a division of life and that a divorce could be imminent. If you’ve been following the Beckhams, the divorce rumours have been happening for, literally, decades. Before though, when we first met Rebecca Loos and Posh was still trying on careers post-Spice, you could say that she was way more dependent on David. Now? The fashion brand is viable. Does she “need” David as much as she needed him before? Before you start running around telling people that the Beckhams are broken though, please note that even though this paperwork was filed December 10th, since then the Beckhams have been together, and lovingly. Two weeks after those documents were filed, they were kissing each other for Christmas: [Kisses at Christmas are always the best ones... Kids took this picture of mum and dad obviously slightly ☺️☺️☺️☺️ @victoriabeckham @brooklynbeckham ... Merry Christmas 🎅🏼] A photo posted by David Beckham (@davidbeckham) on Dec 24, 2015 at 1:45pm PST A week after that they were kissing each other at New Year’s Eve: [And from us of course... Have an amazing 2016 ❤️❤️] A photo posted by David Beckham (@davidbeckham) on Dec 31, 2015 at 11:33am PST Victoria’s latest Instagram post is of David, making doll clothes for H7: [Harper has daddy stitching her dollies dresses!!! We love you @davidbeckham ❤️ #lovingdaddy #proudmummy #familyfun 🙏🏻 x vb] A photo posted by Victoria Beckham (@victoriabeckham) on Mar 25, 2016 at 10:17pm PDT It’s her birthday in 3 weeks. He always does a public dedication on her birthday. We’ll see then whether or not there’s really trouble here. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 7:22 PM [Smutty Tingles] They now have one more than Brange ([Dlisted]) Gwen and Blake’s Easter ([Just Jared]) Will and Katy Cambridge to move to London? ([Cele|bitchy]) I don’t care enough to discuss whether or not I believe this ([TooFab]) Every time these two go out I just keep staring and staring ([Pop Sugar]) I really love the new Baywatch swimsuit ([The Superficial]) Is her hair crimped?! ([Hollywood Tuna]) The international VOGUEs ([Go Fug Yourself]) First useful piece of information from Iggy Azalea – about how they protect Britney ([Gossip Girl]) [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 6:52 PM [Kristen Stewart thumbsucked] [Kristen Stewart and girlfriend, Soko, out together in Los Feliz, March 27, 2016] [Kristen Stewart] and her girlfriend [Soko] were in LA for Easter Weekend. They’ve been papped consistently the last couple of weeks and definitely not running for cover in the presence of photographers. In fact, this is the most open Kristen’s been in a relationship. When she was with [Robert Pattinson] it was practically dumpster-diving every time. With Alicia Cargile, there was less of an escape impulse but it certainly wasn’t what we’re seeing with Soko – holding hands, in the street kissing, and now… thumbsucking? Check it out. At one point, Kristen’s inside the car talking to Soko by the window. Then, I don’t know, maybe she’s feeding her something? Because Soko’s now sucking on Kristen’s thumb. Which, I mean, we all remember what it’s like at the beginning of a relationship. Anything and everything becomes erotic. Anything and everything becomes an excuse to make out. Waiting for pizza? Make out. Shopping in the batteries aisle? Make out. Stopped at a traffic light? Make out. Kristen and Soko’s inability to stop making out seems, from Photo Assumption alone, seems a lot more intense than we saw from her previous romances. Does intensity = drama? [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 5:06 PM [Lady Gaga’s birthday marriage?] [Lady Gaga and Taylor Kinney heading to 'No Name ' Restaurant to celebrate Gaga's birthday party in Los Angeles, CA, March 26, 2016] Today is Lady Gaga’s 30th birthday. I know, right? I always have a hard time remembering she’s the same age as Lindsay Lohan. Anyway, there was a party over the weekend at the No Name club. By Hollywood standards then, just like a regular party with a lot of famous people hanging out – Taylor Swift, Lorde, Kate Hudson, etc. Gaga showed up with her fiancé, Taylor Kinney. Or… husband? People have been pointing out that they were both wearing gold bands. On her, in particular, this is notable because she typically steps out with her huge engagement ring. So now there’s speculation that they were secretly married, even though there were rumours that she’s been planning this big ass event over in Italy in the summer which is kinda more on-brand. She did tell Ryan Seacrest a few weeks ago though that while her ma and sisters were helping with the wedding, “We are not planning anything that is worth writing about" and that it would be more “family style”. Is it possible that it’s happened already? And that Lady Gaga actually did a shocking thing by not making her wedding a spectacle? Am still having a hard time believing it. I have noticed that she and Taylor Kinney have been closer than ever the last couple of months. Almost as though it’s a renewed commitment to closeness. Smelling anything there? [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 3:58 PM [Mimi’s 46th Anniversary] [Mariah Carey on her birthday] Anniversary of what? Please. If you’re a member of the Lambily, you know The Anniversary is March 27th and that this is the how (not really that) Elusive Glitter Butterfly refers to what we losers call our “birthday”. By the way, another well-known accepted Lambily truth: [Mimi] was born in 1970 (even though, um, some people think that may have been earlier. If you are one of those people, f-ck off. Mimi needs to believe she’s a child of the 70s. Who are you to challenge this?). Anyway, The Anniversary, obviously, is the most festive day of the year, apart from Christmas, although Mimi would tell you that Christmas is the most festive SEASON, and The Anniversary is the most festive DAY. Can you feel the difference? No matter what the number, on The Anniversary, we will have specially ordered fireworks to celebrate the most special snowflake of them all: [Last nights #anniversary was #epic #LYM to all that made it such a #festive night !! #fireworks #friends #surprises #lambs #sweetsweetfantasy #lambaversary] A video posted by Mariah Carey (@mariahcarey) on Mar 28, 2016 at 5:35am PDT There should also be a dance party – but AMAZINGLY they’re not playing her music! What is this f-ckery?! [Last nights #epic #anniversary continues #pondeclub !! Thank you to all my #dancers #band #singers #festive #friends who made it so #pip !! @lishy118 #spinning @bryantanaka @anthonyburrell #pow !! So much #fun #LYM 😘😘😘🎉🎉🎉🎶🎶🎶 #sweetsweetfantasy #lambaversary] A video posted by Mariah Carey (@mariahcarey) on Mar 28, 2016 at 5:40am PDT Please note, the video above ends with a shot of Mimi apparently feeling herself up while angling her best side to the camera, the reality show camera, presumably, arranged by her manager, Stella, who supposedly brokered the deal and may or may not be taking advantage of her. Fireworks aren’t cheap. And Mimi was “surprised” by them. Will she, however, be surprised by the bill, when it arrives? Wellllll… Stella’s taken over the accounting too. So… Something for the Lambily to keep an eye on. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 3:01 PM [Beefcake Ezra Miller] [Ezra Miller arrives for the European Premiere of 'Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice' at Odeon Leicester Square on March 22, 2016 in London, England] [Ezra Miller] is about to get to work on The Justice League Part One, in which he stars as The Flash. If you saw Superhero Face Punch over the weekend, you saw him in a cameo as out-of-costume Barry Allen, as well as a super-confusing dream sequence in costume as The Flash that had even veteran comic book nerds going what the hell? (And if you watch The CW’s popular The Flash TV show, you are probably angry/confused that [Grant Gustin], who plays The Flash on TV, is not repeating the role in the films.) Of all the Justice Leaguers teased in Superhero Face Punch, I’m most into Wonder Woman and The Flash, the latter largely because of the casting. Ezra “[TEXTILES]” Miller as a mass-market superhero is a bananas idea. Textiles showed up looking freshly beefcaked to the London premiere of Superhero Face Punch last week. Total body transformation is par for the course if you’re starring in a superhero movie, but I’m not sure why the guy playing the runner has to bulk up. It would make sense for The Flash, of all superheroes, to be a lean and lanky guy, right? Like Grant Gustin is not swole. But Textiles is committed, and did the regimen, and now he looks like a guy playing a superhero. Good? But I am legit interested to see what ole Textiles does with a character like The Flash—generally one of the more chipper, fun superheroes. Assuming, of course, that The Flash as a movie is allowed to be fun. On a semi-related note, I’m weirdly offended on Grant Gustin’s behalf, but over a different movie altogether. I choose to believe the reason he isn’t in the running for the Young Han Solo movie is because the production schedule isn’t compatible with his commitment to The Flash, because the obvious answer to “Who should play Young Han Solo?” is “Grant Gustin”. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 2:32 PM [Emma Stone’s quiet work] [Emma Stone gets gas in Malibu, March 26, 2016 ] La La Land, starring [Emma Stone] and [Ryan Gosling], was [recently pushed back] to December, making it a possible awards season contender. By the time it comes out then, it’ll have been 18 months since we’ve seen Emma Stone in theatres. It’s been 6 months now that she’s kept a relatively low profile after wrapping on La La Land. She gets papped at the gym once or twice a week – see the latest shots below – but for the most part, it’s been quiet, though that doesn’t mean she hasn’t been making some career moves. Emma’s spent her time training for Battle Of The Sexes. She’s to play Billie Jean King opposite Steve Carell’s Bobby Riggs. Half the work then has been to get in tennis shape. Which, I’m sure, has its challenges but also…can you imagine getting paid to become a better tennis player? Battle Of The Sexes is due out some time in 2017 so, presumably, she’ll start shooting by summer. It was also announced a few days ago that Emma and [Jonah Hill] will be working together again on a Netflix series called Maniac to be directed by [Cary Fukunaga]. Given the talent involved, it’s not surprising that Maniac has been ordered straight to series for 10 episodes. Emma and Jonah play patients in a mental institution and will also be producing. It’s supposed to be a “dark comedy”. No kidding. They’ve yet to bring on a writer though for the project which means there’s still a lot of time before they even begin production. I do like how she seems to be slowing down her work schedule. For a while there it was back to back to back to back, at least two or three releases a year, establishing herself as one of the top actors in the business. So she’s earned her gaps. Not going to lie, it did cross my mind, though. Emma and Cary Fukunaga, OMG… ? [Source] [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 2:02 PM [Fairytale of New York] [Girls Season 5 Episode 6 ] Girls Season 5 Episode 6 recap Ohhhh, this was such a great episode. I knew as soon as Desi repeated “recoiled from my touch” that we were getting to the real truth of the thing, mainly that you can be way too much, like Marnie Michaels is, and still not be able to deal with the way too much that is Desi. But that wasn’t the point. The point, of course, was Charlie. God, everything about him was bad news in the best way possible. And that’s saying something, because my first and most visceral memory of Charlie is of him saying ‘do you have anything for me?’ in the pilot, right before Marnie coughs up her retainer for him, literally. No matter what startup-related douchery he got up to later on, he was always going to be a caretaker. In fact, his character description [in the pilot script says 'oozing kindness']. But people change. “There was some legal bullsh*t, I wound up with nothing.” Charlie doesn’t ooze kindness right now…that’s who Desi is. (God, the sight of them in that ‘room’ he constructed! Did you ever feel more claustrophobic?) Desi wants their whole world to be that studio apartment, that bed, and Charlie’s world is big. Huge, by comparison. He has friends named weird West Side Story things and they seem like the chorus of a musical, galloping behind him. He’s acquired a Brooklyn accent because…of course he has. He’s nothing like Marnie remembers. Nothing like we remember. Is anything true? Did his dad really die by suicide? Does it matter? Because he opens everything back up for Marnie in a way we didn’t know she needed. You can live in the coolest part of Brooklyn and have the most introspective career that’s still considered a job and still need this desperately. Nobody ‘needs’ an obnoxious old-people party at a hotel on the Upper East Side…unless they’re Marnie. Unless they do. I can’t remember if we’ve ever even seen Manhattan the way we see it this episode. For Marnie, it’s a tonic. Sure, she figures out early on that Charlie is dealing drugs, maybe – but she smiles. Her face is open and her hair is down. She makes a prostitution deal that seems stupid in its simplicity and that definitely, definitely borrows lines from Pretty Woman, which would of course be Marnie Michaels’ prostitution reference. Charlie is enthusiastic and charismatic and rowboat-stealing, and completely and totally useless in the face of a seemingly pathetic mugging, it should be known. Still, Marnie is determined not to care. “I’m not trying to change anything”, she keeps saying, and she actually seems to believe it. She’s reveling in Charlie’s dirty bed, terrible apartment, ‘Humble Life’ tattoo. She’s liberated from everything – from her old life, her stuff—even her wedding rings. Marnie can’t help but change. She’s finally allowed to change. And then of course the fairy tale is over, Charlie is a junkie. A lovely, warm junkie, but still. Marnie has to collect herself and go—but she’s changed. Marnie’s hair is down this whole episode, which it never is. In fact, even wet-hair-in-the-shower Marnie responds as normally as she can when the amazing-haired Julia Garner appraises her tits. The new Marnie walks home, shoeless. Hair still down. No more armor. She tells Desi she has a lot of sh-t she has to work out. How does she wind up in situations like this? If she hadn’t dumped out Charlie’s gear by accident, how far away would they have gotten, ‘running away’? Probably Stamford, maybe Cincinnati, but still. Sure, she may get murdered since that’s how unaware of the world she is, but why has everyone always been protecting her so hard? Most importantly to me is how much time the show spent showing us that Desi was a bad guy. Or thought he was a bad guy, or both. He moaned over and over again that he was going to hurt her, and yet he winds up sobbing on the stairs (but also, sobbing about her not wanting to get a scone, so I’m not sure she’s wrong here). She never thinks about Desi once, despite all the threats that she’d be left at the altar. None of it comes true. If he did hurt her maybe patterns would be the same. Now, though, it’s different because it has to be. There’s that thing that happens with people from a long time ago. We’re so different than we were back then, we know so much more and we’ve had more experience. But at the same time…we were less guarded then. They knew more of us, maybe, because we didn’t know how to hide as much. So when we see them, no, it’s not going to work out, and yes, maybe we’re running from our current lives - but something about it is the kind of unfettered real experience that tends to make you realize you’ve been straying away from the person you promised you’d be. I’m not sorry for Marnie’s adventure, and I’m going to alternate listening to that amazing final track, and the title song for this article, Fairy Tale of New York. I’m excited to see what comes next, even if it’s several steps backward. But I am sorry she lost those high-tops. I really liked those high tops. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 1:39 PM [Superhero Face Punch gets it done] [Ben Affleck, Amy Adams and Henry Cavill on 'The Graham Norton Show', March 25, 2016] It wasn’t pretty and it will be debated forever, but Superhero Face Punch hauled in $424.1 million worldwide this weekend, with an estimated $170.1 million coming domestically, breaking The Hunger Games’ pre-summer record. If the movie paces like The Dark Knight Rises did in 2012, it will crack the much-needed $1 billion benchmark, though there’s already a feeling that Warner Brothers will settle for something in $700-800 million range and call it a win. As long as it breaks the $700 million plane, it will be an acceptable franchise launch. That’s good superhero business and makes for a solid springboard for future films. Last week the movie got [pummeled] by critics—including [me]— but how did it fare with fans? Not much better—it earned a B CinemaScore. Though the CinemaScore scale does go down to “F”, the way the scale breaks down means a C is a failure, and a B is a not-great result. Consider this: Man of Steel, widely regarded as a divisive movie, got an A-. And The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which was considered a failure, got a B+. So a B is hardly “mission accomplished”. A solid half of the audience did not like Superhero Face Punch, and they’re spending way too much money to please only half the people. EVERYONE needs to like these movies for the franchise’s long-term health. There was never any question that Superhero Face Punch would make money, it’s only a question of how much. We’ll know more after its second weekend in release, which is when its fate will be decided. The good news is, there is absolutely no competition and it will have cinemas to itself. The average movie drops 50-52% in week 2, which ought to be a very easy line to hold. The bad news is that B CinemaScore—word of mouth won’t be in its favor. Man of Steel, which got a warmer reception from audiences, dropped over 64% in its second week. So it really could go either way for Superhero Face Punch. But, with $170M in the bank, it won’t really matter. The future of the Justice League is secure. (Lainey: so why does [Ben Affleck] look so sad? As is always the case when it comes to Ben Affleck, be careful what you wish for.) [Source] Attached - Ben Affleck, [Henry Cavill], and [Amy Adams] on Graham Norton and Ben on Fallon last week. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 1:26 PM [Courteney & Johnny back together] [Courteney Cox and Johnny McDaid shopping together in Malibu with Courteney's daughter, Coco, March 27, 2016] It was confirmed right after US Thanksgiving that [Courteney Cox] and [Johnny McDaid] had ended their engagement. And it seemed permanent. By the time the news was made public, he’d already gotten the f-ck out of LA and moved back to London, supposedly because he was into a quieter lifestyle and she hung out with her friends too much. [Click here] for a refresher. A few weeks later she was seen [having dinner with Will Arnett] though they insisted they’d known each other a long time and were just friends. Yesterday, Easter Sunday, Courteney and Johnny were seen together for the first time in months, out with her daughter, Coco. Does this mean they’ve reconciled? When they broke up, word is they’d been heavily in to therapy to try and work things out; in particular, it was reported that Courteney pushed hard to get him to reconsider. And while I’m not a parent, I feel like you don’t mess around with involving the kids if you’re not sure about what’s happening in the relationship. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 1:07 PM [The Walking Dead 6.13-15: “Sometimes you have to”] [The Walking Dead Season 6, Episode 15 ] The Walking Dead Season 6, Episodes 13-15 recap We’re down to the last episodes before the ninety-minute finale of The Walking Dead, season six, and besides an Obligatory Secondary Character Death and the penultimate episode’s Cliffhanger You Know Won’t Amount To Anything, not a lot happens. Three hours of The Walking Dead amounts to maybe an hour of meaningful storytelling. I’ve said it before but it bears repeating—sixteen episodes is just too much. The Walking Dead should be no more than twelve episodes a year. Ten, ideally, but I’d accept twelve if it would get us tighter, more propulsive storytelling. Episode 13 could be subtitled “Ladies in a Bottle”, since it’s a bottle episode featuring predominately female characters. We pick up with Maggie and Carol in the hands of Paula (Alicia Witt, once again being better than the part written for her) and a cohort of Saviors. Most of the episode happens in just a couple rooms—thus the bottle episode status—with additional hallways thrown in for relief. This is the kind of filler episode that screams “budget shortfall”, thanks to the limited sets, small cast, and lack of costume changes. In a twelve-episode season, this doesn’t happen at all. Nothing terribly interesting happens in this episode, except for some conversations about Maggie and her pregnancy, all of which we’ve already had with Lori and Judith, and we get to see Carol’s deteriorating mental and emotional state. Thanks to Morgan, she’s having a crisis of self and no longer wants to kill, even though she can’t stop killing. Seriously, in episode 15 she writes a Dear John letter to Tobin and is like, “I can’t love you because I can’t kill for you,” and then she runs out and kills a bunch of people. If we’re going to take Carol down this (extremely stupid) pacifist route, at least commit to it. Although they have committed to it with Morgan and it’s ruined his character. In episode 15 we get yet another Rick And Morgan Have Useless Conversations moment when Morgan reiterates his “all life is precious” philosophy and Rick looks at him like he’s crazy. WHICH HE IS. We’ve seen enough of the Saviors to know they’re bad f*cking news, and they are OBVIOUSLY stalking/spying on Rick & Co., so why take chances? It’s f*cking dumb and it’s making Morgan the stupidest, most intolerable person on the show because he represents a wild safety risk no reasonable person in this universe would tolerate. At least Carol recognizes her pacifism has no place in Alexandria and she bugs the f*ck out. Which, naturally, puts everyone else in danger because no one on The Walking Dead makes good decisions. Daryl goes out after her, which means that while Rick and Morgan are chasing Carol, Glenn, Rosita, and Michonne are chasing Daryl, chasing Carol. Of course people end up captured, and we’re meant to think that Daryl gets shot at the end of the episode, but c’mon. No one is buying that. This show has already burnt that bridge. These three episodes expose every weakness The Walking Dead has developed over the last few years—the navel-gazey self-important filler, faux-death psyche outs, romantic subplots no one cares about (looking at you, Rosita/Abraham/Sasha), and pointless philosophical debates already hashed out in previous seasons. The only really memorable thing to happen is Eugene biting some guy’s dick in self-defense. Eugene the be-mulleted badass is kind of a fun character. The only real positive development is that we’re clearly building toward a major character death. No one cares about killing off secondary characters we barely know—although Denise’s death has the sting of [Dead Lesbian Syndrome]— and constantly faking out the deaths of main characters does more harm than good, but the wind-up is obviously happening. A major character is about to bite the dust, and several key characters are in danger going into the finale. Daryl, Glenn, and Michonne are Savior-bait, and Maggie is at home, having cramps. My money’s on Glenn and/or Maggie, because this show has confused nihilism with drama. But one thing is certain—if they don’t pull the trigger on a main character in the finale, despite all its gory trappings, The Walking Dead will be a show with no balls. [Click here for the rest of the photos.] Posted at 12:54 PM [March 28, 2016 – Smutty Shout-Outs] [Matthew Goode for Karen ] Karen! Happy Birthday from Mary who requested Matthew Goode. Hope you two stay bonded over Beyoncé. It’s Beyoncé season! 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