Dappered | JCPenney’s Shutdown List, A Futuristic Fabric, and Neil the Lady-Killer

[Dappered | JCPenney’s Shutdown List, A Futuristic Fabric, and Neil the Lady-Killer]() --------------------------------------------------------------- [JCPenney’s Shutdown List, A Futuristic Fabric, and Neil the Lady-Killer](r/Dappered/~3/thNN9xxZAjc/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email) Posted: 24 Mar 2017 03:00 AM PDT SCIENCE! [Neil Degrasse Tyson from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( As if this dude isn’t the shit already. This is the best. One of the most famous scientists in the world won a gold medal for the University of Texas at a national Latin Ballroom competition in 1985. LONG READ OF THE WEEK: [This. Is. Fascinating.]( There is a plan in place for when Queen Elizabeth II dies. This is not a surprise. But the context, the history, the plans – it is worth the time. Take this, for instance: “The King’s life is moving peacefully towards its close,” was the final notice issued by George V’s doctor, Lord Dawson, at 9.30pm on the night of 20 January 1936. Not long afterwards, Dawson injected the king with 750mg of morphine and a gram of cocaine – enough to kill him twice over – in order to ease the monarch’s suffering, and to have him expire in time for the printing presses of the Times, which rolled at midnight. BARF: [This is why we’re fat.]( H.O.A.s: [Where American tyrants go for training.]( UGH: Anyone else beginning to wonder if we aren’t pulling a [DEVO]( and headed into the [beginnings of a downward spiral?]( No? Just me? Alrighty then. I will just crawl back into my elite, edumacated hole. WILD MEN! Wilde Männle vor 1914 [Wilde Männle vor 1914 from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( These men are honoring Thor. So right there, they’ve got my interest. Then there’s the get-up. Still interested. And what’s this about a ritual? Get the quick what’s-what [here](. You will find a German take [here](. Seriously. It’s German language. But [this might help](. I say “might” because it’s just a Google bot translation of a crowd sourced article. That is so 2017. Also, I was shocked to learn it was nothing at all like [I was expecting](. THE OLD GUARD…[continues to die off.Â]( THE NEW GUARD…[reboots and upgrades when necessary](. THE OLD GUARD…[still hasn’t learned a thing about optics in this day and age.]( Brand fail on top of a year of terrible press. THE NFL: Somehow the whole thing just smells worse every other week or so. It seems like there are less and [less capable people looking out for the best interests of the players]( while the owners get more and more public assistance for their stadium projects. Meanwhile, actual puking happening as a result of the third to last paragraph [here](. I wonder if Mr. Fine Art Appreciator [owns one of these?]( IT’S BOOTSY, BABY! [Bootsy from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( THIS MIGHT BE HELPFUL…if you, like me, [can never remember your blood type](. It is something that my brain refuses to hang on to. A little like [this]( without the skin art. Also, completely irresponsible so don’t be like me. But yeah, I’ll need a whole bunch. A REMINDER: [This is never ever going to be acceptable behavior.]( Neither is [this](. And [this is just a special kind of wrong.]( I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to be silent if I run into this kind of stuff. LIFEHACK OF THE WEEK: [This is a bigly pet peeve of mine.]( Yuuge pet peeve. As in bark at my laptop because I am so annoyed bigly. SPRING HAS SPRUNG: I don’t know if you’re lucky enough to be out digging in the dirt where you live right now, but if so, [congratulations](. Experience tells me there might be something to this. POOF: Another worthy long read about [people disappearing on public land](. Perhaps more than you think. And then, because this is just wild, [this bit of legal limbo.]( WHERE IS MY MIND? [Fight Club Pixies from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( OOH LOOK: That one time when [Paul Newman was just matchstick limbs and a ginormous head](. DOSSIER UPDATE: [This story gets worse and worse]( with every new detail of what is clearly a disaster in the making. Just, wow. Editor’s Note: [Ocean’s 13 anyone?]( THE SAGA CONTINUES: [These guys are having a hell of a year.Â]( CONSEQUENCES: I would say [this has got to hurt]( but I imagine there will be a comforting parachute package to lessen the pain. O.M.G. [Heads will explode](. I have to wonder how many people will be shaken by this in a way that makes them look at everything a little bit whole lot different from what they’ve always believed (hand raised sheepishly). ONCE UPON A TIME: [Patrick Stewart 1977 hubba hubba from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( Eric H. returns with another hearty bunch of “hey, would you look at that” for this week. RTFM: First they were all like, check out our amazing fancy high tech toilets and I was like whatevs and then they were all like but [what about this tub]( and I’m all rub a dub dub. For the record, please do not tarnish Eric’s terrific image by thinking he wrote that. That stinker is all me. [eric-all-star-small] CHARLOTTE WOULD BE SO PROUD: Once upon a time I was a wailing arachniphobe but today I have a comfortable relationship with spiders. Mostly. [They are pretty crafty](. And they do us all a solid [where this is concerned](. CONSEQUENCES: [This is what happens when you run your company the way you do](. It’s that simple. But it is worth pointing out how completely disconnected they seem to be about anything outside their reality which reinforces certain stereotypes about the “coastal elites.” And that is not good brand management at the moment. UH TIM…about that lifehack? Turns out [Eric also found a hopeful fix for the terror of the web](: the autoplay video. See above. And as a Mac user I would like to thank him for his having tried it out so I don’t have to. I don’t believe he is impressed. But, as the disclaimer goes, your results may vary. HEATED SEATS: I’m going to let Eric call this one: “Some call it the Divorce Machine or This is Marriage Counseling in action, or Double the Fun. [My wife just says, No.”]( MORE OF THIS PLEASE: [Hidden Figures from | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( CLASS OF ’97: [Feeling old yet?]( [eric-all-star-small]MICROGRAVITY IS A BIATCH. I started to read this and got caught up in it and before you knew it, I was [all in](. It seems like this might be something of a reality check. Where are the sleep pods (every space travel movie ever)? You mean to tell me [this is fake too]( MORE OF THIS: [This might freak some people out.]( But this is a relatable reminder that we are all just people. We just want to do the stuff we like to do and go about our business. Mostly. SERIOUSLY PEOPLE: [What the actual fuck?]( I know. Sorry for the f-bomb but it seemed like it had it coming. AURALISHUS: I have been told “It’s dark. It’s rude. It’s a bit older. The [Darkside]( mix.” I will also say it is percolating the hell out of my insides. And I’m pretty sure I’m not making those noises. Also, as weird as this seems, it appears The Beatles only live album (recorded in the mid 60’s, released in ’77) only just now sounds like it was supposed to. As Eric says, [AMAZING](. And finally…excuse me while I melt into the [gooey haze of this over the top awesomeness.Â]( JOE’S ABS WORKOUT: [Abs workout | The Weekend Dossier on Dappered][(thank you)]( Pretty much. Dude is a beast. These comments will immediately be deleted and the headline edited when it gets to the editor. Perhaps a Peaky Blinder reference. Or a wrestling pun. Editor’s Note II: More like Captain Picard’s. Who knew? WHAT’S THE BUZZ? When your entire business plan is in peril, [it is smart to take action](. And it seems to be an idea that [really, really connected with people](. OFFERED WITHOUT COMMENT: Don’t Ok. Well, actually, it turns out it is really hard to do that about [this.]( I’m trying to be patient and such. And by the way, while I’m starting fires, [this](. But I will say a little something about [this](: mad props for the General Lee action there. I’m thinking you had someone looking out for you. DEJA VU: Didn’t we see something [like this]( in a rom-com or did I make that up? Regardless, [best own goal ever](. Meanwhile, shouldn’t this be classified under [“don’t push your luck?”]( I will answer that. Yes. Yes it should. THAR SHE BLOWS! No matter what’s going on [here](, (and it is pretty nifty, I will admit), I’m pretty sure Rumspringa Humpback is going to be my new alter-ego. INCOMING! This is a not-at-all-not-even-close or in the vicinity of anything remotely to do with the monochrome theme. However, this looks like it will be beyond beautiful. Once again, Eric H established his dossierables by including this in his suggestions this week as well. Tim Johnstone is [Dappered’s music correspondent]( as well as our resident gatherer of all things interwebs related. He doesn’t really hate people. [Mostly]( ff/Dappered?a=thNN9xxZAjc:QyqpchuPe3g:yIl2AUoC8zA ff/Dappered?a=thNN9xxZAjc:QyqpchuPe3g:qj6IDK7rITs ff/Dappered?a=thNN9xxZAjc:QyqpchuPe3g:gIN9vFwOqvQ [Allen Edmonds & Massdrop joining up again, BR Suiting, & More – The Thurs. Sales Handful](r/Dappered/~3/OQzTst5r4ug/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email) Posted: 23 Mar 2017 08:20 AM PDT Sales that deserve some attention heading into the weekend or a bit earlier. Might not be some massive once a year event, but still worth a look. Those are what make up these handfuls. Five of the better sales, one for each finger, are below, plus bonus sales if need be. Included are a few picks worth pointing out. [Massdrop: Return of the AE Chukka]( [Italian Made Sneakers]() [Massdrop]( - [Allen Edmonds Unlined Chukka – $239.99ish]( FINAL - [Italian Made, Stitched Sole, Full Grain Calfskin Sneakers – $89.99]( FINAL NOTE: Allen Edmonds Massdrop Chukka launches at 9am ET AND IT’S ALWAYS FINAL SALE Final sale shoes are almost always a bad idea. But… these Allen Edmonds chukkas are the real deal. I fought off the usual side-eye I give final sale shoes and bought into these things the last time they were available. Two observations: They are NOT go anywhere at anytime boots. Also, they’re downright luxurious. The suede is buttery and then some, yet the last shape keeps the toe and heel in comfortable structure. Again, these things are not rugged. I mean, they’d hold up okay I’m sure, but they feel more luxurious than trail ready. So, be warned. Big thanks to Mark G. and James W, for sending in the tips on their return! [Banana Republic Suit Sale](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/category.do?cid=1033817&sop=true&mlink=5001,13121691,hp_spotlight_MCTA&clink=13121691) +[20% off BR Gift Cards via Staples](republic+gift+card/directory_banana+republic+gift+card?fids=Department_3A_22Gift!Cards_22) [Banana Republic Suits] - [Monogram Slim Fit Suit Jacket](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=487723002) + [Slim Fit Pant](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=487729002) = $415.50 ($648) - [Monogram Standard Fit Suit Jacket](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=487733002) + [Standard Fit Pant](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=487734002) = $415.50 ($648) - [Italian Wool Peak Lapel Slim Fit Suit Jacket](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=486128002) + [Slim Pant = $288](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=486130002) ($596) - [Italian Wool Peak Lapel Standard Fit Suit Jacket](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=512888002) + [Standard Pant = $288](//bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1076761&vid=1&pid=542183002) ($596) ***NOTE: Prices above ^ reflect purchasing & using [those 20% off giftcards at Staples](republic+gift+card/directory_banana+republic+gift+card?fids=Department_3A_22Gift!Cards_22)*** Big thanks to Jon F. for this tip. Ready to play the game? Let’s play the game. So Banana Republic is running a suiting sale right now (up to 40% off) and their usually excluded Monogram line is up for the discount. Word is that their Monogram suits [MIGHT be fully canvassed now](? Possibly? You can also save even more if you pick up some GAP inc. gift cards via Staples (of all places… who knew?) at a 20% discount. So, let’s say you want that “Cascade” Monogram suit that’s shown above. Usually it’s $648. With the sale, it’s $515.50. SO… head to Staples and buy $500 worth of BR gift cards for $400. The final price of the suit then ends up being $415.50 out of pocket. Oh, and if you use a GAP inc. credit card for the purchase? You can knock an extra 10% off with BRCARD. [Brooks Brothers: $100 off $300, $200 off $500 w/ BCSP17](//www.brooksbrothers.com/mens/men,default,sc.html) [Brooks Brothers](//www.brooksbrothers.com/mens/men,default,sc.html) - [Regent Fit BrooksCool Blazer](//www.brooksbrothers.com/Regent-Fit-BrooksCool%C2%AE-Blazer/MD00078,default,pd.html?cmp=AFC_US_CJ_Dappered_www.brooksbrothers.com_4025845&utm_medium=affiliates&utm_source=cj&utm_campaign=4025845&cvosrc=affiliate.cj.) ($498) + [Magnetic Money Clip](//www.brooksbrothers.com/BB%231-Rep-Magnetic-Money-Clip/MQ00038,default,pd.html) ($24) = $322 ($522) - [Regent Fit Seersucker Suit](//www.brooksbrothers.com/Regent-Fit-Stripe-Seersucker-Suit/MK00755,default,pd.html) ($498) + [Jazz CD](//www.brooksbrothers.com/The-Lincoln-Center-Jazz-Orchestra-with-Wynton-Marsalis-CD/998D,default,pd.html?dwvar_998D_Color=NONE&contentpos=1&cgid=Mens_sale_category) ($7.25) = $305.25 ($505.25) - [USA Made Goodyear Welted Burgundy Wingtips – $328](//www.brooksbrothers.com/Leather-Wingtips/MH00216,default,pd.html) ($428) - [USA Made Goodyear Welted Medallion Perforated Captoes – $328](//www.brooksbrothers.com/Medallion-Perforated-Captoes/MH00025,default,pd.html?dwvar_MH00025_Color=MDBR&contentpos=85) ($428) Two tiers, and some exclusions here for sure. No Filson, and some of their shoes are excluded, but it does appear that the Allen Edmonds made selection is up for this discount. Remember, you can always pick up something cheap to tip the balance if an item is just below a threshold (like that BrooksCool blazer). [GAP: 40% off Everything + Free Shipping w/ FFSALE](//www.gap.com/browse/subDivision.do?cid=5065&mlink=5058,12456145,visnav_M&clink=12456145) [GAP Belts](//www.gap.com/browse/subDivision.do?cid=5065&mlink=5058,12456145,visnav_M&clink=12456145) - [Basic Belts in Brown, Black, or Light Brown – $23.97](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=5135&vid=1&pid=600175022) ($39.95) - [Slim Fit Jeans – $35.97](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1050839&vid=1&pid=180217002) ($69.95) - [Twill Blazer in “Army Green” – $58.80](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=48873&vid=1&pid=523295002) ($98) - [4-way Stretch Hybrid Khakis – $47.97](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=80811&vid=1&pid=812999012) ($79.95) - [Classic Mac Jacket – $76.80](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=48872&vid=1&pid=523289002) ($128) - [Lightweight Bomber – $47.97](//www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1079463&vid=1&pid=523284012) ($79.95) Usual exclusions? THEY DON’T APPLY. This time. Friends and family event, so, even jeans and leather accessories are up for the discount. Free shipping no minimum is a nice bonus too. No $50 threshold to trip. [Huckberry: Astorflex Chukka & Chelsea Sale]( [Astorflex Chukka & Chelsea]( - [Made in Italy Chelseas – $159.98]( ($180) - [Made in Italy Chukkas – $129.98]( ($145) Certainly more casual than the Massdrop Allen Edmonds chukkas, thanks to the textured, natural rubber sole, but much less expensive. Made in Italy from thoughtfully sourced materials. Super comfortable. [Full review of the Chukka can be found here](. Also worth a mention: - [J. Crew Factory](: They’re still running [an extra 35% off voucher]( through Gilt City. - [J. Crew]( 30% off Select Items + [Extra 30% off Sale Items]( w/ HAPPYSPRING. Picks [here](. - [H&M]( Their mid season sale is still going on. - [Lands’ End](//www.landsend.com/shop/mens/-/N-fz6?cm_re=nav-_-mens-_-main): 30% off w/ OFF30 & 1705 - [Jack Spade]( 25% off Sale Styles w/ SPRING ff/Dappered?a=OQzTst5r4ug:hQkmjWpc_n4:yIl2AUoC8zA ff/Dappered?a=OQzTst5r4ug:hQkmjWpc_n4:qj6IDK7rITs ff/Dappered?a=OQzTst5r4ug:hQkmjWpc_n4:gIN9vFwOqvQ You are subscribed to email updates from [Dappered Style Mail](). To stop receiving these emails, you may [unsubscribe now](. Email delivery powered by Google Google Inc., 1600 Amphitheatre Parkway, Mountain View, CA 94043, United States