Advice to a guy haunted by an inferiority complex

An Email Players subscriber asks in confidence: === Hi Ben. Not sure how you will respond to this one. But I don't know who else to go to about this. You are the only person whose advice is actually working for me. So yeah. Here I go: For as long as I can remember, I have suffered from an inferiority complex. Probably because I never got a significant win in my life. Like something on which I set my eyes and went on to achieve. Even if I gave it my all, I was always bested by someone else. Who I knew didn't work as hard as me. This has haunted me during my entire student years and has even crawled into my professional life. Developing into a negative cycle of self-loathing... Feeling like I will never be good enough... always looked down upon by people... thinking I will never achieve great things. I am at that point where I don't have confidence in my ability to achieve goals. Often leading me to quit things I really want to do. The reasoning of my dumb brain - why try if I can't hit that mark I set for myself? I have tried many mindset "hacks", tried working harder than I usually do but to no effect. I don't know man. I really want to fix this shit but I don't know how. You might be thinking that this guy is being a little bitch. I might be. I don't know. Because I don't really know what the actual problem is. Whether it is a mindset issue or a performance issue. Hopefully, you can shed some insight on this. Maybe recommend some reading. I would really appreciate it. But feel free to dismiss this if you want. I will understand. === My 2-part, totally anti-climactic, answer: 1. Out-work everyone or anyone you compete against- win or lose, brand spanking new or seasoned pro, it does not matter... you can always out-work the other guy, literally nobody can stop you from doing that except you 2. Only focus on goals you can control, ignore all other goals Everything else that matters you can't control (wins, your self respect, etc)? That’ll all take care of itself over time. That’s been my experience. It’s also what I do every single day myself. And you know what? It’s worked out pretty good so far.. I’m not much of a self-help or mindset kinda guy. I’m more of a “do ungodly amounts of hard, brutal, agonizingly painful work that make lazy people want to wretch and let that be my therapist and self-help” kinda guy. But, I do have a few things to say for those seeking more help with the inner game of things in my Villains books. Plus, unlike most of my books these are super inexpensive. Simply start with the first one (Persuasion Secrets of the World’s Most Charismatic & Influential Villains) and read it — which you can do in one sitting. They are very short books intended to be read and not gawked at or slogged through. If you like that first one, read the second one (Supervillains of Persuasion). And if you like the second read the third one (Villainous Weapons of Persuasion). And if you like the third one? Then be patient. Because next year I may very well be writing a fourth one. We will see. In the meantime you can read about the other ones here: [( Ben Settle This email was sent by Ben Settle as owner of Settle, LLC. Copyright © 2024 Settle, LLC. All Rights Reserved. No part of this email may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission from Settle, LLC. Click here to [unsubscribe]( Settle, LLC PO Box 1056 Gold Beach Oregon 97444 USA